Take a Risk

Today’s lettering prompt from Holly Pixels

I got some new Procreate brushes from Creative Market, by Callie Hegstrom, to play with and they are super fun! Lots of fun rough edges and texture-y things you can with them.

Taking risks is part of being creative and it just is what ya gotta do to keep going, learning, and experimenting with your work.

It’s also a big part of my life lately, jumping off feet first into big weird new unknowns but it’s so very worth it. Taking my chance when it’s handed to me in no uncertain terms to make big changes in my life, leaving toxic people behind, and then leaving all the crap that goes with that behind. Sometimes things are given to you in the worst and most cruel possible way, but exactly when you need them. In the end it becomes a gift. A gift of freedom from all the “stuff” holding you back. My eyes were opened to some things I hadn’t worked through before, and now that I was forced to and I have, finally, I am so so so grateful. In leaving that stuff behind, I’ve found me. The true me. The one that is not afraid to speak up and defend herself, to not allow people to scapegoat, take advantage, or treat like a piece of crap, living and playing small to not attract attention or rock the boat.

When it went down it was unimaginable and hurtful, and hateful, but now I see the gratitude in it and am thankful. I know now, from all the learning I’ve done, it’s all them, 100%, and absolutely nothing to do with me and never was.  I can’t imagine ever being again where I was before. Trying to fit in with people who I know now just didn’t care about me, and who would rather ignore, play along, closing their eyes to reality,  than take a truly honest look at themselves and their behaviour, words, and treatment of me.

It makes me cringe now. Maybe even feel like barfing. I’ve learned so much and grown so much since it happened, and healed so much. And I’ve forgiven myself for taking so long to really see it all for what it really is, and do something about it.

I took their unintentional gift and I ran with it and saved myself and my life. And now I’m in love where I am! Huge blocks have melted away and I am free to take even bigger risks and chances, and so far, it’s pretty darn awesome. It takes time to break old patterns and beliefs, basically reprogramming yourself from the ground up. But I love it and wouldn’t change a thing.

I am grateful for my tribe who has stuck by me and for best husband who is always there and doesn’t let me give up or give in. So grateful.

Only more good things coming! Take a risk and grab that chance when it comes along. It might be scary, or weird, or crazy, but it’s there for you to take and do what you want with. Let’s rock some boats, bay-bee!!

 

By |2018-01-25T14:16:39+00:00January 25th, 2018|Artist Life, Gratitude|0 Comments

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