Blooming, finally

Over the past couple of years or so, I’ve made some pretty big necessary changes in my life. It wasn’t fun, it wasn’t easy or pretty, but it was time and made very clear that I had to finally do something and stand up for myself, my husband, and my life.  So I did. I’ve written and thought so much about it, it makes my head spin so I won’t go into major details here,  but once I came out the other side, it was life changing and soul affirming in a huge impactful way, for the better.

I’m grateful it all went down as it did,  because in the end, I found me. And I really like who I found. I saw an old photo of me from a few years ago and I don’t even recognize that person anymore. I feel like I’ve dropped so many years and piles of stuff and just marched on as a new me that I can unleash and be free.  And that’s a freaking awesome feeling.

Now, I’m rewriting my story. It’s very liberating to know that you can do that. You can totally do that! It’s a thing!
All the crazy, effed up stuff that happened over my life made me who I am now, but it doesn’t have to affect me negatively or keep me stuck where I was. I can choose what parts I want to keep and toss the rest. I’ll never forget, and may never forgive, (and importantly I know now that I don’t have to and it’s ok! Really!) but I will use that as strength to live the best life I can, with my husband, dogs, and art.

Now, with all that said and done, all these changes have brought about more changes in my work and what I do, it’s kind of a rebuilding process of absolutely everything from the ground up. Being an artist and a creative person, everything I do is all a massive part of who I am. I don’t separate myself from “work” and “non-work” time, it’s all me, and all creative work to me (but fun – mostly- work!). Lately though, some pieces of what I was doing were starting to feel more like obligations and I’ve already said, with love, “Thank you but no thanks!” to a few of those.
And so, I’m going to be making a few more changes here too.

The big one is that I’m not going to be sewing in a professional capacity anymore, by choice. I love sewing and I’m so grateful for the opportunities I’ve gotten from sewing, quilting, and writing and designing patterns, but holy it takes a lot alotta lot of time for not much pay (or sometimes none at all), and it just doesn’t make sense anymore when that time could be going to working on something that helps pay the bills. I don’t want to go into teaching or write a book or design any more patterns, which seems to be what a lot of people do with it all as they go along that path. So, I’m demoting it back to a hobby. I am a hard-wired lifelong sewist though, so I’ll always sew no matter what, just not professionally. I still love quilting and making fabric-y things, just not as a job.

And so, I’ll be changing the focus of this site to be all about art and illustration, and lettering. I create in a few different realms of art, the big one right now is art for licensing. And that’s where I want to be focussing more time, building up my art library with my fab agent, as I’m starting to get a really good response and some really cool projects and contracts have started coming in, which is super exciting.

And painting of course. Gosh I love painting. And lettering. And iPad-ing. Ahhhhh… I’m seriously vibrating with happiness and excitement just thinking about it!

I’m planning on shutting down this blog and changing the site to be a portfolio site featuring my work, because I really want to get my work out there and start illustrating, lettering, and painting, and go big big big! (working on this already!). Apologies if you are after any of my archived sewing patterns or tutes, they will be going by the wayside once my new site goes up (soon).

I’m finally ditching the fear of not being good enough, or cool enough, or hip enough, and just let myself, my art, and style flow and go with what happens. Stop trying to fit in and just shut up and do it and be truly me in every single way and everything I do. Show up, do the work, and let it out into the world. No more watering down or worrying if my work is “cool” or “on trend” not, or trying to be someone I’m not. It’s time to really share my story.

Change is good, it’s scary, but good. Letting go of things that don’t work anymore is hard, but necessary, and I need to be growing what does work and what lights that fire under my butt to keep going.

It’s time to switch things up and go for the glorious gusto. With glitter and sparkles and loads of vibrant colour!

I’m grateful to everyone who has stuck with me and supported me and my work, and I hope you’ll stop by & say hi! I’ll be maintaining and updating my Facebook and Instagram pages with news so stay tuned!

With much love and gratitude as always,

 

 

About the Author:

2 Comments

  1. Nicole Hannah May 24, 2018 at 9:37 pm - Reply

    Wow, and yay you! I love your attitude towards the personal stuff. I’ve had a different approach to shitty personal stuff and I want to change that, so I will be encouraged by you. Best of luck with the career focus changes. I’ll be lurking over on IG to keep an eye on your work.

    • Cynthia May 25, 2018 at 7:37 am - Reply

      Thanks!! It’s been a challenge for sure but I’m trying to just focus on the good that came from it all. Finally getting some toxic people out of my life who proved that they never cared about me or my husband, which reduced my anxiety and stress massively (and I figured out they were a huge source of that and some other root issues I’ve since dealt with so good riddance). Now it’s about finding the gratitude in it and seeing that if it hadn’t all gone down as it had, I’d still be stuck where I was and that wasn’t a good place to be. Now I’m out I can really see just how much damage they did and tried to do and I’m grateful that I can really see it now and don’t have to put up with it anymore. Bleh!
      Onwards and upwards! 😀 <3

Leave A Comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

This website uses cookies and third party services. Ok